Simon Halford Counselling and Psychosexual Therapy
Portsmouth & Southampton / Central London

Men's Issues

Erectile Dysfunction
Loss of Libido
Premature Ejaculation
Difficulty Ejaculating
Sexual Addiction

Erectile Dysfunction


ED can describe a number of conditions including -

  • Difficulty getting an erection
  • The loss of an erection
  • Only achieving a partial erection

    Causes of ED

    There are many causes of ED and often there are more than one factor contributing to the difficulty. The causes can be grouped under four types -
    I. Psychological factors for example:
  • Performance anxiety
  • Lack of confidence

    II.Physical factors for example:
  • Tiredness Stress Diabetes

    III. Relational factors for example:
  • poor communication
  • fear of disappointing partner
  • sensitivity to criticism

    IV.Contextual factors for example:
  • Loss of job
  • Side effects of medication
  • Lack of privacy

    Once the condition becomes established it is often the case that all four sets of issues can interact in a complex manner.

    So, for example the condition may be triggered by a physical issue such as tiredness but then the individual becomes anxious about the problem reoccurring. He may then avoid contact with his partner and she then may react to these changes. In this way the condition quickly becomes a multifaceted problem.

    It is often characteristic of ED that it becomes progressively worse as the individual becomes more anxious and upset about the problem and as his sexual confidence diminishes.


    This condition responds well to a variety of treatments.
    I.Individual therapy - Through one to one discussion we can establish the nature and cause of your erectile dysfunction and the best way to treat it.

    II.Couples therapy - good exploration of the nature and possible causes of the problem with the couple and honest sharing of how the problem is effecting them both can often lead to improvement or resolution of the problem. (N.B. if couples therapy is not possible individual therapy can be helpful)

    III.Medication - there are a variety of medications that can help give reliable erections and they are often only needed for a short period of time while the sufferer gains confidence. It is nearly always the case that such treatments are much more successful when offered in conjunction with individual or couples therapy.

    What Next?

    If you are concerned about Erectile Dysfunction please give me a call and we can set up a meeting to explore your particular situation and how best to treat your difficulties.

Premature Ejaculation

Premature ejaculation (PE) occurs when a man experiences orgasm and expels semen soon after the initiation of sexual activity and often with minimal penile stimulation. It is usually defined as ejaculating in a minute or less from penile stimulation or penetration.Although men with premature ejaculation describe feeling that they have less control over ejaculating, it is not clear if that is true, and many or most average men also report that they wish they could last longer. Men's typical ejaculatory latency is approximately 4–8 minutes.

Men with PE often report emotional and relationship distress, and some avoid pursuing sexual relationships because of PE-related embarrassment.Compared with men, women consider PE less of a problem, but several studies show that the condition also causes female partners distress.

The condition responds well to treatment. Treatment usually entails some practical exercises and therapy. This can be assisted by medication.

Retarded (or Delayed) Ejaculation

Delayed ejaculation, is a man's inability for or persistent difficulty in achieving orgasm, despite typical sexual desire and sexual stimulation. Generally, a man can reach orgasm within a few minutes of active thrusting during sexual intercourse, whereas a man with delayed ejaculation either does not have orgasms at all or cannot have an orgasm until after prolonged intercourse which might last for 30–45 minutes or more The condition can be sensitive to context so it may be that the condition only exist when partner is present or during penetration. This condition responds well to treatment, which often involves couples therapy and a progressive approach to enabling ejaculation in the desired circumstances.

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